A LinkedIn roast is a short, merciless write-up of a profile, built from its real numbers: headline, followers, posts and engagement. Paste yours or a competitor's and we also rank it against thousands of creators.
Free. Brutal. Your competitor will never know it was you.
How it works
01
Paste a public profile
Any linkedin.com/in/… URL. Yours, or the competitor whose posts keep showing up in your feed. Nothing to install and nobody to log in as.
02
We read the numbers
The headline, the follower count, how often that profile has posted lately, the engagement those posts earned, and the rate behind it. Real figures, not vibes.
03
You get the burn
A short, specific write-up built from those numbers, the profile’s place on the creator ranking, and a card you can share or quietly keep to yourself.
Illustrative examples
Example roasts
Three fictional profiles, each a LinkedIn type you have scrolled past this week, roasted in the same format the tool returns for a real one. The headlines and numbers are made up; no real person or company is behind them.
Example 01 · fictional profile
The big account that went quiet
Headline
Founder | Advisor | Building in public
Followers
48,200
Posts · last 60 days
1
Avg engagement rate
0.4%
The roast
The headline says building in public. One post in 60 days to 48,200 followers, so the public has been staring at a fenced-off lot with a crane nobody has climbed since spring.
Example 02 · fictional profile
The daily poster nobody answers
Headline
I help B2B founders scale with LinkedIn | Daily tips | DM me GROWTH
Followers
2,140
Posts · last 60 days
58
Avg engagement rate
0.3%
The roast
58 posts in 60 days, every one a free lesson on how to scale with LinkedIn, at 0.3% engagement. The two days off were the best-performing content of the quarter.
Example 03 · fictional profile
The headline with four job titles
Headline
Thought Leader | Keynote Speaker | Future of Work Visionary | Top Voice
Followers
6,900
Posts · last 60 days
4
Avg engagement rate
0.8%
The roast
Four titles in the headline and four posts in 60 days, so each title got exactly one shift. The Future of Work Visionary has seen the future of work, and it is mostly not working.
Why the burn usually lands
Most LinkedIn feedback is either flattery from your own network or a generic “post more consistently”. Neither tells you anything. This one starts from what the profile actually did: the gap between follower count and engagement, the week-long silences between posts, the headline that claims thought leadership while the numbers claim otherwise. That is also why it stings: the material is your own posting history.
The same data powers two things worth reading next: the public LinkedIn creator ranking, where thousands of profiles are scored and ordered, and the State of LinkedIn report, which is what those numbers look like across the whole tracked set. If you would rather be measured than mocked, the free LinkedIn GTM audit scores your motion instead of your ego.
FAQ
Questions people ask before pasting
How do I roast my LinkedIn profile?
Paste your public profile URL (the linkedin.com/in/ address) into the box at the top of this page and press Roast it. There is no signup and nothing to install. A profile that has been roasted before opens in seconds; a new one takes a minute or two to fetch and score, then the roast opens on its own page.
Is the LinkedIn roast actually free?
Yes. No signup, no card, no email gate. There is a daily cap on brand-new roasts so the queue stays fast; when it is used up the page says so and the counter resets at midnight UTC. Profiles that have already been roasted still open instantly.
Can I roast someone who isn’t me?
Yes. Any public LinkedIn profile URL works: a competitor, a prospect, the person who ends every post with “agree?”. They are not notified, and the roast never says who asked for it.
What does the roast actually read?
The profile’s headline and title, its follower count, how many times it posted recently, the engagement those posts earned, and the average engagement rate behind them. The roast is written from those numbers, which is why it lands differently for a daily poster than for someone who last posted in 2023.
Is the roast written by AI?
Yes. An AI model writes each roast from the profile’s own data: the headline and title, the follower count, how often it posted lately and the engagement those posts earned. It is kept to one to three sentences: a setup, then a punch.
How long does a roast take?
A profile that has been scored before comes back in seconds. A brand-new one has to be fetched and scored first, which takes a minute or two; the page keeps polling and shows the roast the moment it is ready, so there is nothing to click or refresh.
Where does the rank number come from?
The same leaderboard behind the public GTM Brigade creator ranking, where thousands of tracked LinkedIn profiles are scored and ordered. The roast shows where the profile you pasted lands in that list.
Is the roast mean? Is it safe to share?
It is a roast, so it stings, but it only goes after what the profile does on LinkedIn: the headline, the posting rhythm and the engagement. It is written to stay away from appearance, age, gender, ethnicity, religion, family, health and politics, with no profanity or slurs. Sharing is your call: the roast comes with a card you can download or post, and nobody sees it unless you send the link.
Is my roast public? Will it show up in Google?
Every roast gets its own link you can share, and those pages carry a noindex tag, so they stay out of search results. Nothing is published unless you send the link yourself.
I’ve read my roast. What should I do next?
Look at the numbers behind it. The public creator ranking shows where the profile sits among thousands of scored LinkedIn profiles, and the State of LinkedIn report shows what posting and engagement look like across the whole tracked set. To score your team’s LinkedIn go-to-market motion instead of one profile, the free LinkedIn GTM audit takes about two minutes.
Your buyers are already on LinkedIn. Find out which ones are warm.